So I missed my Monday Mix-Up, not because I forgot, but because I knew today was a bit more special and I really wanted to save this blog post for a rainy day! Here in South Texas, Hurricane Bill has made landfall and well I guess the rain could be worse, but it is not unpleasant quite yet. Some may already know, but I really really love my husband A LOT. Today, we celebrate the first time we officially labeled our relationship boyfriend/girlfriend..labels..hate them/love them! Words from a girl, who has loved and been loved endlessly to the same man for a decade!!
I could go on about cheesy saying such as he is my “best friend, we are inseparable and we are simply the most awesome couple without any fights or disagreements whatsoever!” The truth is with A DECADE in our relationship, we have had plenty of crashes and burns, we have had spells of simply no talking, but a grunt here or there to say yes or no! I say we, but really me! Clinton is the most relaxed, chill and carefree person I have ever known. When we first got married, for one we were that couple that had not lived together and we were merely 19 and 20 years old. I remember trying to pick fights with the guy, just so I could see maybe a little steam, but no..I have always failed, Clinton has this smirk and he knows me all to well, he knows I am trying and because he is who he is..I can never keep a straight face and simply smile and giggle. We learned early on how to constructively argue and disagree. I knew the boundaries and because I respect my husband and the man he has been called to be, to lead me, his wife..I have tried not to cross them, because words are something that linger and I believe we knew that all too well before we married. I used to get so upset when people would look at us and say “y’all are still so young and only have that fresh kinda love, so it is only a matter of time!” It was as if they wanted us to fail at such a beautiful relationship. Yes, we were young, but because of being so young, we learned early on how hard it could get.
We lived in an efficiency, the first 6 months of our marriage, we worked jobs at minimum wage, I attended college full time and by faith we managed to pay all of our bills on our own. We stayed tight with finances like many couples and we then moved into a 2 bedroom apartment across the street(same complex). We adjusted to work life, school life and being parents..yes, we had a baby..a handsome boy! When we were 21 & 22 we bought a 4 bedroom house and thought we were for sure grown ups and then Clinton and I hit a few bumps in the road trying to adjust to our new living situation and finances, we made it, but not before sharing tears on the kitchen floor and having many long embraces with plenty of “it’s going to be okay” talks. When everything else seemed to be going wrong, we held on to God and to one another. We easily could have made the mistake of turning from one another, but what was familiar, always was… us! New adventures, new bills, new curve balls..Clinton through it all has always been so strong, and he made it look easy. When my faith faltered, and my heart closed off to God..he constantly poured every ounce of love he had into me, his forever bride.. he spoke words of encouragement, he read verses and he brought me back to the cross, he never just let it be, even though I had asked him not to speak “Jesus” to me.
We surprisingly, found out we were having twins.. I was not excited, my heart was hardened by the news and all I could do was cry. He on the other hand was excited, he had wanted twins from the get go, maybe the timing was a bit early, but all the more the man was beaming ear to ear..until he found out it was girls…he had no idea what to do with girls and if they were anything like his firecracker of a wife, his hands were going to be full!! I can remember when I first found out that I was pregnant (I was 4 months pregnant when I was married, no we did not get married because I was pregnant), for one I was ashamed and for two telling Clinton’s parents was going to be tough, but telling my papaw and mamaw, just seemed a bit more tough.
I can recall my papaw looking at me and saying “I hope you have a girl, that way you will know what I had to put up with!” with a glisten in his beautiful blue eyes, he could not help but laugh, we both did. When I went on to have my son, I kinda teased him because I did not have a girl. With twin girls, I guess you can say that I laughed and teased too soon! It was a surprise, but God had a greater plan he always has.
The girls are every bit their mothers child and my son is every bit his father, which I can easily be more than proud of. We pray constantly for one another, we encourage one another and we have each others back. We have good days, we have bad days, but in the end. We are worth fighting for, we matter and our relationship and love for one another matters. In the last 10 years, I would say “communication, apologies, respect, encouragement and always putting the other before yourself!” is the best start to any relationship and some ways to keep it healthy! It is not always about you, that is okay because if you have it right..the one you choose, will always be about you!
P.s. Marriage/Being in a committed relationship is work, but not in the sense of dreadful work, it is fun, it is comforting, achieving and exhilarating…plus it has many perks!!
Dude, celebrate marriage whether it is one year or 50…
Happy Decade, Baby!!